Life is just a bit hectic right now. Mostly by choice – I have kicked started organising a #teachmeetNZ in term 2 which takes a bit of planning, I has a Microsoft catch up session, and I applied and got selected to present at a conference in Toronto (squueeeeeee!!!!!!!) in a couple of weeks time. Add that to Energise in Queenstown in April (you should come!!!!), general life events and crazy, it makes for a busy time.
So I am currently thinking about some different presentations I need to do. Which is challenging for lots of good reasons – mostly because sharing makes me THINK about what I am doing and why.
It forces me to reflect on my practice. It makes me clarify my own points within my head. Sometimes it makes me double back and check something I started and left by the wayside, other times it makes me realise things aren’t quite working they way I would like and how can I change that. I am a bit obsessive about presentations like these – while the slide deck might be a bit thrown together, I always agonise over the message and ‘theme’ I guess.
It also makes me think – am I putting the same level of thought into ALL of my lessons? obviously it needs to be sustainable re workload, but am I really doing it a good job, or just rolling out stuff cause I can (or I am too busy doing other things… like presentations for conferences….)
I often wonder why some people are so reluctant to share. I know some people have ideas around inadequacy – maybe I am falsely confident, but I feel ok presenting. Maybe growth mindset helps – I am really interested in the questions people might have, or ideas they might have. Maybe it can be a thankless task – I have been in the situation where I worked really hard on a presentation and had 3 people show up, and 2 seemed more intent on checking facebook…. I’ve also been the one checking facebook…. and sometimes I guess you can get fatigued from always presenting or sharing – it is some-one elses turn I hear myself saying….
But I am at a loss to know how to change this mindset with NZ educators…. surely we can’t all be that bad as to not think we have ideas worth sharing. Surely we can’t all be that bitter and twisted about wasted time, nor we have not all presented everything we know….
I guess it is the same with blogging. I like blogging because it helps me organise my thoughts. Sometimes I blog for me, other times I do blog more specifically to share…. but it always helps me reflect on what I am doing and why.
I am also wondering how I can shape these next few presentations to be less me standing telling and more collaborative. How can I walk that walk?
Lots of wonderings…… why do I do this to myself again 🙂